I'll share one! (I hope y'all aren't sick of my name here lately)

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: “The Big Female” : by Dean Alessandrini : So I was in the city of brotherly love on a business trip and Dan Felice was nice enough to invite me to his place to meet him and see his critters. : I walk into his living room, which by the way is lined wall to wall and floor to ceiling with cages, and Dan offers me a beer. I’m usually not a drinking man…but…I figured what the heck, it would be bad manners to refuse his hospitality, right? : So, one beer turned to 2, (of course being a lightweight, I was feeling it) and then Dan, apparently with this all planned out, then offered to let me get out his Drymarchon one at a time. : First I handled his (very very nice, by the way) unicolors, one at a time. I thought it was kind of funny as Dan stood back as I handled them. They were a little whippy but didn’t offer to bite or even look aggressive. : Then came the yellowtail time. : Now, as you know, I’m not a man inexperienced in the ways of wild-caught yellow tail cribos. I kind of assumed they would be pugnacious critters. They didn’t let me down. Actually, the first one I handled, a male, didn’t bite. : Then Dan suggested (as he HID …lol) that I get out “the big female”. : It was all starting to make sense now…the 2 beers were to get me “10 feet tall and bullet proof” I guess. : It worked. : Reaching into the cage as she was flattening and threatening, I managed to get her out of the cage without being tagged (quite an accomplishment). I stood near a living room chair and let her whip back and forth through my hands. She started to musk, then, apparently mistaking the back of the chair as part of my body, lunged forward and grabbed the back of the chair and chewed it for a few seconds. We both laughed nervously until she let her grip go (I think she knew we were laughing at her) and lunged at me. I successfully dodged the first jab…then she landed a wide-open mouth on my right forearm. : Now when I say “wide-open” I mean wide open like nothing I’d ever seen. The mouth was completely vertical. Top jaw sunk in deep about four inches higher than the top jaw (which was also sunk in deep). : I gave her a second to let go on her own…then she took it a step further. She began to TWIST her mouth….seemingly trying to remove a hunk of flesh from my arm. I swear I could see that “take THIS” expression on her face. : “OW” : I noticed Dan looking for his camera at about this time…but I don’t think he found it quick enough. : I don’t remember how she let go…but I believe it was voluntary on her part when she figured out I’d had enough. Back in the cage she went. : I bleed freely from about 100 holes in my arm. I had a nice bite mark “tattoo” for a week or so, but no real damage was done. : All in fun… : And revenge is sweet Dannio… : Seriously, thanks for the hospitality Dan. The experience makes for a good memory!

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